Shelby Lynne: I won’t die alone.

Animated nightmares.

Cool masks. My fave is Poisoned Tree.

Some of you might know I have otherworldly connections.

So after reading former President Gerald Ford’s express his criticism of President George W. Bush’s unnecessary invasion of Iraq, I thought it would be interesting to see what other former presidents thought.

So I contacted Ronald Reagan in the afterlife.

Here is the actual transcript:

Carnacki: I haven’t conducted a séance in ages. How’s the connection?

Reagan: Fine. I hear you loud and clear.

Carnacki: I’m kind of surprised to find you’re not in hell.

Reagan: It’s that forgiveness issue. You still don’t understand it.

Carnacki: I’m still new at the whole faith thing, but leave me out of this.

Reagan: Well there you go again.

Carnacki: So did you see the interview with President Ford and his remarks on the Iraq invasion?

Reagan: I did. I’m not surprised he asked for it to be published after his death. It’s so much easier to say what you really think once you’re dead. For instance, I think George W. Bush is wrong for his view on stem-cell research. My dear Nancy speaks for me. George W. Bush? My political heir? My ass!

Carnacki: Can you say ass where you are?

Reagan: Yes. You should here some of the righteous anger coming from the Creator when President Bush claims to be following the voice of his ‘Father.’

Carnacki: So would you have invaded Iraq?

Reagan: I made some bone-headed mistakes in my time as president, but no, I would not have invaded Iraq. Iraq was not a threat to national security interests. I would have rounded up a posse and gone after Osama bin Laden. President Bush should have been ridden out of town on a rail for dropping the ball on bin Laden.

Carnacki: Didn’t you help create him?

Reagan: As I said, mistakes were made. But he never launched an attack on the United States during my administration and if he had I never would have sent troops to invade another country when bin Laden remained free. I would not have left that job unfinished. Now I was criticized for taking a lot of time off when I was in office. But at least I showed up to work more than George W. Bush. I always knew he was a punk born with a silver spoon in his mouth, but has he no sense of a work ethic? You’ve got to admit, I would not have stayed on my California ranch if I received a presidential daily briefing saying, “Bin Laden determined to attack.”

Carnacki: I can’t imagine any president not immediately taking action to such a warning.

Reagan: Right. So the buck stops with Bush for fumbling on that. You should have heard his father complain about ‘Georgie,’ about what a Momma’s boy he was. He’d complain about how he’d never amount to anything. Sometimes I’d have to say, ‘I’m sorry about your son. But I’m busy working on the Middle East right now.’

Carnacki: Really? You were involved in decision making in your administration?

Reagan: Yes, the Saturday Night Live skit was spot on.

Carnacki: What do you think of Ann Coulter’s comments regarding your decision to leave Lebanon after the Beirut barracks attack?

Reagan: Who?

Carnacki: Coulter.

Reagan: Never heard of her. However, as I said, mistakes were made. Only a fool doesn’t change in response to circumstances. That is why George W. Bush is not only the worst  president ever, but the worst man ever to be president.

Carnacki: Hey, I wrote that earlier today.

Reagan: I know. I lurk on Daily Kos every day.

Carnacki: Really? I figured you’d be a Free Republic or Red State kind of guy.

Reagan: Hahahahaha! Like I said, only a fool doesn’t change in response to circumstances. Knowing what I do now, I never would have left the Democratic Party.

Carnacki: Thanks for taking the time for this interview.

Reagan: Quite alright. I have an eternity of it.

Check out The Horror! Things that go blog in the night.

Cryptomundo compiles a list of fascinating stories from the year.

The BBC covers the amazing details:

The bird, a captive African grey called N’kisi, has a vocabulary of 950 words, and shows signs of a sense of humour.

He invents his own words and phrases if he is confronted with novel ideas with which his existing repertoire cannot cope – just as a human child would do.

N’kisi’s remarkable abilities, which are said to include telepathy, feature in the latest BBC Wildlife Magazine.

snip

In an experiment, the bird and his owner were put in separate rooms and filmed as the artist opened random envelopes containing picture cards.

Analysis showed the parrot had used appropriate keywords three times more often than would be likely by chance.

This was despite the researchers discounting responses like “What ya doing on the phone?” when N’kisi saw a card of a man with a telephone, and “Can I give you a hug?” with one of a couple embracing.

Entire article worth reading.

Santa vs. The Flying Spaghetti Monster

some of them are just Miguided.

Misguided angel hangin’ over me
Heart like a Gabriel, pure and white as ivory
Soul like a Lucifer, black and cold like a piece of lead
Misguided angel, love you ’til I’m dead

and some just hang out in the City of Angels. and hold some people in their arms.

In the arms of the angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you feel
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
you’re in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here
you’re in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here

You might think shaking this snow globe would get old after a while, but it never has for me.